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"long-term girlfriend (hopefully soon fiance)"

Propose, then ask your finace to take a three-month leave of absence from her job so you both can volunteer in a developing nation.

Use idealist.org or a similar website to find a location and organization that appeals to both of you. Then spend 3 months helping, learning, and "resetting".

There are a few reasons why volunteering is like "travel++"

1. You can take time off from work. It's almost impossible for a company/manager to deny a request to volunteer overseas. Denying that request is like saying "No, our widget factory is more important than {poverty|famine|oppression}" and there is massive social stigma that prevents that from happening. Both of you will be able to take the time off. Yes, this is a travel hack.

2. You need three months in a place to really experience it.

3. Helping others is one of the oldest, and most universal, ways to produce happiness. It's like a nuclear power plant for self-fulfillment.

4. Seeing poverty up-close will annihilate any Westerner's malaise. It's suddenly very, very hard to get into a funk about your career when you're watching a family live on $2/day.

Normally I would add the "YMMV" disclaimer, but I think you will find that this prescription has a 100% success rate. Everyone I know who's spent time volunteering overseas describes it as a life-altering experience.



"Propose, then ask your fiance..." Judging by the OP's question, and that he seems to be a bit "out of it" generally speaking, I don't think getting married at this point in time is the best idea, especially when he's so young. Marriage is the most important decision you'll make in your life, and speaking from the man's side of it, you should likely anticipate serious modifications to the formerly implicit agreements decided upon before marriage....just fair warning.


You're right, that was too flippant. I also hope people didn't stop reading at that point, as what I'm really advocating is the volunteerism.

If I had edit powers remaining, I would remove that line.


"Seeing poverty up-close will annihilate any Westerner's malaise. It's suddenly very, very hard to get into a funk about your career when you're watching a family live on $2/day."

I wish I could upvote this comment more. Throughout my teenage years and early 20's, I had serious problems with depression and existential angst. Then I lived in China and witnessed firsthand the relative poverty that most of humanity lives in.

I realized how absolutely silly and trivial most of the problems we well-to-do Westerners think we have are. It changed my life - I am a much happier, calmer, and more stable person for it.




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