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Honesty is not a skill, lying successfully is.

Neither is kindness. (And forced kindness can be patronizing.)



> Honesty is not a skill, lying successfully is.

I can see why you would think this. Lying successfully ultimately takes more work than being honest. Being honest is like swinging a golf club or tennis racket correctly. It feels awkward and unnatural at first, but eventually gets easier. Honesty definitely is a skill, though.


It's a habit. Personally, I think lying takes up way too much mental space. It's sort of like driving with the seat belt unbuckled; just makes me anxious.

It's a skill to be honest faster, and with less hesitation. The faster you can be honest, the more benefits you reap from it.

Kindness is similar. You want to be kinder faster, with less hesitation.

Otherwise, it will feel forced.


I think honesty is a skill by the dictionary definition as you can certainly do honesty badly, and learning to do it well is difficult and requires study and practice.

It's also worth learning how to do well.


> Honesty is not a skill, lying successfully is.

Nonsense. The skill of honesty is fighting your instinct to lie. If you actually try to always be honest, you'll discover that it's not as easy as you are claiming.

> Neither is kindness. (And forced kindness can be patronizing.)

Well, let me ask you, when you decided to leave a comment, did you make that decision with kindness in mind? :)


Maybe "radical candor" instead.of honesty?

Or maybe specifically giving honest feedback to others.




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