> [extroversion] comes naturally. They don't have to work hard at it. They are not thinking and analyzing and calculating about it. They just do it without thought

I'm not sure I would frame it as a fixed trait (genetic).

I completely agree one shouldn't neurotically overthink everything. Faking a response using rationality is unhealthy; also people don't respond well to fakeness nor the apparent manipulation.

I believe we can change ourselves somewhat, but I always try to think along the lines of internal encouragement (or even operant conditioning).

I guess my underlying belief is that we are both rational and irrational, and that our rational side can influence our irrational side by self-teaching.

Then again I hate this modern belief that we can do anything if we just believe in ourselves enough. Of course the outcome is that we blame ourselves if we don't make it, or blaming our society (which isn't any more helpful).

Life-goals are a modern weirdness, and there's a lot of adjacent woowoo like manifestation.