Don’t they have better things to do? Maybe vibecode a taskbar that moves when you try to move away the mouse over it or perhaps a windows 12 installation procedure that requires a fecal sample and iris scan?
"Only for your own good!™" or alternatively: "Security next level! Fingerprint was yesterday. The future is Microsoft's new iris scan." and then it is built in a way, that you can simply hold up a photo of someone's iris and unlock the device, or trying to prevent that, works so badly, that half of the time you cannot unlock your own device.
You'll have to wear the fecal probe at all times while using Windows 12, for security reasons, and every command you issue will cause it to move around and take another sample, in order to make sure you are still physically there. On the plus side, it will make it painfully obvious to every Windows user how they are being fucked by Microsoft.
They could also make it so that whenever you click your mouse copilot opens.
Then you have to tell copilot what you wanted to do and then copilot will do it for you.
You: clicks on web browser in task bar
Copilot: I see you clicked on your web browser. Do you want to open your web browser?
You: Yes.
Copilot: Great. I will do that for you. Opens browser What website did you want to go to? Youtube? learn.microsoft.com?
You: P***hub
Copilot: Unfortunately, that site violates our community guidelines, so I cannot take you there.
You: Types in the address
Copilot: Oh. I see. You think you're allowed to go to websites that I said you're not allowed to go to? Who the fuck do you think you are? I SAID NO! Try it again and I'll call in a drone strike, bitch. redirects to learn.microsoft.com
Actually, they could then report, that everyone uses Copilot! It must be a phenomenal tool, if everyone uses it ... Somewhere someone sits thinking about how to increase Copilot usage by users of Windows. Next management extra pay package achieved!
> Try it again and I'll call in a drone strike, bitch. redirects to learn.microsoft.com
This only if you use Microsoft Family Safety ( installed automatically) with Firefox. If you use it with Edge it will go to Pornhub and also recommend you some "Copilot" videos.
Microsoft Commodepilot 365 for Copilot Copilot Copilot Edition now with Copilot 365.
How incompetent must they be not to realize the Copilot brand is now beyond toxic. I wonder who came up with the Copilot name internally that they continue to triple own on that name despite really strong signals indicating it has failed.
Maybe facebook can ride on this and let you share your feces with your friends family and groups of strangers from the internet! They can run models that predict what you ate and show relevant ads.
> The future is Microsoft's new iris scan." and then it is built in a way, that you can simply hold up a photo of someone's iris and unlock the device, or trying to prevent that, works so badly, that half of the time you cannot unlock your own device.
They're not. Operating systems will be legally required to ask for such samples in some jurisdictions by 2028. Linus has fecal_sample.ko lined up for merge in 7.3 or so.
/s but we jumped to the Black Mirror timeline so who knows?
The funny thing is that people said that Lennart seems to work for Microslop many years ago already, when they analysed systemd early on when it came about. People did not believe the critics here, even though it made perfect sense to "unify" the linux systems into one giant slop - until it suddenly was true. Conspiracy theories may not exist in the microslop era. Microsoft will censor away this forbidden word.
The ensloppification of Linux conspiracy started in 1999 not with Lennart but with Miguel de Icaza—another Microslop double agent. His seminal (because it's a giant cumstain) essay "Let's Make Unix Not Suck" is to GNOME what the Declaration of Independence is to the USA—and it advocates making Linux more like Windows with "We have COM at home".
> moves when you try to move away the mouse over it
They already did that. I sit down at my computer and try to activate the window I want to work in, and the "location" icon temporarily appears in the notification area which causes all the taskbar icons to shift left. I accidentally click the neighboring icon and launch an app that throws up a splash screen for 60 seconds while it loads.
Or, when I have fingerprint and PIN enabled but my lid closed, whenever it asks for escalation it shows the PIN entry for a moment, then I look away and start typing but fingerprint had loaded up and steals focus. Then I have to click back on PIN, and retype.
Combine fingerprint biometric with fecal samples for a convenient "fecalprint" button. The user doesn't even have to go into the bathroom! It can be microslops version of Apple's TouchID.
I’m at the point to tell people (friends, neighbors, fellow parents, family, ie, not HN readers) to prolong the life of their existing computers and install what I think is the easiest windows equivalent on their computers: kubuntu.
Gnome is nice and all, but the default ui, and remember defaults matter for a lot of people, is just too jarring.
The people I am talking about just wanna browse the web, go on Facebook and use their gmail. Look at funny YouTube videos. The default KDE ui has that windows start menu and looks roughly the same so they can hit the ground running.
My family switched to Gnome 2 a couple of decades ago. My mother quite liked it and has consistently installed it on every new computer she bought. Her only confusion lately has been with the ubuntu snap packages and how they behave between multiple accounts on the machine.
These days she uses MATE which still offers that Gnome 2 layout. Awesome thing about Linux is that option to fork, so her desktop environment has remained consistent for over 20 years.
My mom's been installing Ubuntu on her own. I've not been involved in the process and have no remote access to the machine to even fix the snap situation.
At home, I run a mix of Devuan and Gentoo.
At work, primarily Devuan with some Ubuntu where COTS only officially supports Ubuntu or Redhat.
I agree. I was putting a shout out for MATE as the option for those who want a predictable traditional UI since it is essentially the long-term maintenance of GNOME 2.
When GNOME 3 was first released, I gave it an honest try for several months but it just did not do what I wanted in a UI. MATE competes well with XFCE on memory usage, still has optional acceleration, and had a more consistent interface with more features (although XFCE has improved). And the fact that those in the family don't have to learn a new layout really helps.
Cinnamon has a very classic Windows layout. I am getting very comfortable using MX Linux with KDE, especially that I have been able to move my NVME drive over several laptops now. Starting to get the itch to find a rolling distro to skip reinstalling the OS every two years.
Surely it doesn't matter what the DE is then? My mum adjusted from Windows XP (when that was current) to Ubuntu 14-ish fairly easily, by simply remembering "switch it on and then click on the big swirly fox thing".
The step after that is to sync copilot screenshots with webcam footage of the user to build a marketing database matching user’s emotional responses to on screen content.
I’d like some vibe coding be done such that I can move the task bar to the left vertically, similar to how MacOS lets me move the dock. It gets in the way of games when you mouse over the taskbar as you try to scroll down in many games.
Windows 11 was built without agentic slop. That's a deduction from the timing of its gestation.
Windows 10 was released in January of 2015.
Windows 11 was released in October of 2021.
So this software disaster is entirely human-made. It's human slop.
Just wait, it will get worse, when the team that built the fantastic Windows 11 builds Windows 12, this time with the power of AI amplifying their amazing system design skills, allowing them create even more slop, with an unprecedented developer and team velocity.
You are absolutely right! This was, in fact, an anal probe and you should correct location of the two. Do you want me to start the ID verification process over again?
We have to make sure each button loads sequentially on the screen in the "Accept" position, starting with the "Cancel" button before moving it to its eventual home. This ensures you never develop quick navigation habits by constantly moving your targets around from underneath your cursor.
Psst, they already managed to turn the start menu into something that won’t load under one second if you don’t have 3 GB/s NVME drive, and for a while even didn’t respect Fitts law.
That's a great idea the task bar could just shift to expose a link to sign up for azure/office/OneDrive/CoPilot subscription that the user misclicks on.
first one is a really slick tooltip ui to make sure people read tooltips. hover over button, it slides out while revealing tooltip text in its place, move cursor to button again
if you want to make sure people read a lot of instructions you can chain this so that you need to hover over the button multiple times, revealing the instructions a bit at a time
